Want to make better choices? This is how.

So you are working really hard to make some amazing changes in your life and everything is moving along smoothly.  Then self-sabotage mode sets in and before you know it you have reverted back to your old self. You are then swallowed by self-doubt and are sitting on a mountain of guilt wondering if you will ever be able to change.  Sound familiar?

It does to me.  I have spent a lot of time working on making myself a better person and letting go of things that no longer serve me.  Then a few days ago I found myself hanging out with people I probably shouldn’t be hanging out with and doing things I probably shouldn’t be doing.  The next day, I came to my senses and spent a few days feeling guilty and wondering where I went wrong.  Then I felt guilty for feeling guilty because I know that I need to forgive myself for my negative actions and move forward, but I wasn’t.  It’s a vicious cycle, I know.

Luckily for me, I had a Divine intervention.  I realized that my icky feelings were due to the fact that I knew that I was engaging in negative actions and my views were no longer in line with those actions.  I had done enough work on myself to know that the actions that I used to engage in daily without a problem in the past, were now detrimental to my personal growth.  Therefore, my mind was feeling a disconnection between my views and my actions.  In a way, I was glad for the feelings of guilt. It meant that I was way past living in self-sabotage and that deep down inside, I was ready for a permanent change.

The trick now is to learn to not engage in negative activities in the first place to avoid not only the unpleasant feelings afterward, but to be effective in my personal growth.  I don’t believe that what we experience happens to us by sheer coincidence.  I believe that our everyday experiences are our teachers assigned to us at a predetermined moment to teach us a lesson.

To be completely honest, I know that my intuition was very subtly telling me not to engage in foolish actions in the first place, but I refused to listen to this soft voice. My stubbornness took over and then a loud alarm had to ring inside of me in the form of guilt for me to take notice.

I realized that the icky feeling after participating in last week’s crazy mischief was my intuition ringing an alarm inside of me to warn me of the potential hazard of partaking in self-defeating activities.  My intuition was highlighting a danger zone and telling me to stay away.  My only job now is to listen to my inner guidance and allow it to lead the way.

Perhaps this has happened to you.  You set out to eat healthier and before you knew it you downed a few Cokes and ate more than your fair share of cake.  You may have started the year off right putting some great workouts in at the gym and come March you are no longer feeling motivated for that sexy beach bod anymore so you quit working out.  And after all these shameful regressions, you feel guilty.  You want to try again but you are terrified of failure and decide it is easier to not try at all.

So where do we go from there? After temporarily relapsing on our progress, how do we make sure we come back stronger? The answer to those questions is to become an active listener of your inner voice.  This voice that is full of wisdom can always lead you in the right direction.  Because the voice is soft and low, does not mean it should be ignored.  By allowing this voice to flow through us we manifest desired actions.  If you ignore this voice and experience an unpleasant feeling, quickly forgive yourself; do not wallow in self-pity or guilt.  Then allow that feeling to empower you in the future when you are faced with a decision to continue with your progress or relapse. Tune into the voice within you and recall the last time you encountered a similar situation and make an honorable decision from a centered place.

So tell me, how you deal with set-backs? How do you create effective change? Leave a comment and let me know!

Lots of Love,

Sol Ballard






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