How To Create Flow In Your Life

“Accept—then act. Whatever the moment contains, accept it as if you had chosen it. Always work with it not against it. Make it your friend and ally, not your enemy. This will miraculously transform your whole life.”

Eckhart Tolle from his book The Power of Now
It literally took me yeeearrs before I could fully comprehend this quote and use it in my everyday life. 

When we suffer we hold on to the idea of how things should be. We are suffering because we feel that we have been wronged, that things should be different. Maybe we feel that we should be loved more, or that things should be easier, maybe we should have more money, or we should be better looking. We hold on to these ideas tightly, and we don’t let go.

When we experience something “bad” in our lives, e.g. getting fired, a breakup, we mourn the death of this fictional future that we had constructed in our minds. We suffer because things are not the way we thought they should be.

When we experience a situation not in accordance of what we thought we should have experienced we then spiral into a delusional fear about what the future will hold because things didn’t happen the way we thought they were supposed to.

This causes so much friction in life because it cuts off the flow. There is resistance in every moment. It’s hard to heal emotionally because we get so caught up on the idea on how we’ve been wronged.

Back in my day, I used to always do this with relationships. I thought that my boyfriend should be more caring, and that he should be more loving, he should express himself more, he should make me his number one priority, he should not have any emotional baggage, he should, he should, he should….

I was never accepting of a moment or a person. I failed to realize that things shouldn’t be like anything. People and moments just are. It was up to me to accept that things are the way they are so that I could find a way to work with them or accept them so that I could move on.

Years later I learned to invite flow into my life not by trying to mold moments into my idea of how they should be, but by accepting them and letting life surprise me. By accepting what came my way and then figuring out the next step.

Acceptance doesn’t mean tolerating negative circumstances, negative people, or negative behaviors, it means taking something for what it is so that you can then proceed in a way that best helps your personal growth.

Let go of how you think people and things should be and allow people and things to be the way that they are. Then decided if what those people and things have to offer is something that is conducive to your path or not. Don’t dwell on your own idea of how things should be but kindly and gently work with what you have. As Eckhart Tolle says, whatever the moment contains, accept it as if you have chosen it.

The more you learn to work with the moments instead of working against them, the higher quality of life you get to live. Remember to work with a moment you first have to accept it, and then you proceed in a way that best helps your personal growth.

Life is made up of tiny little moments: make them your allies.

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